Keeping in touch

Tonight I finally got time to spend a few hours with an old friend. I dropped her off at her residence, and she had to walk a few hundred feet to get to the main entrance of her apartment. I found myself waiting in the parking space to make sure she got to the door safely.
As Hello Helicopter (by Motion City Soundrack, a band that Brandy and I both felt strongly for,) played via Pandora in my car, I considered the state of my life. It would be biased of me to assume that all of America is going through similar realizations, but I keep wanting to generalize; Why do WE have to live in fear, why do WE have to worry about whether or not our friends will make it home safe?
Well, I haven't taken much time to say this, but this is the hardest thing I've ever done. These wristbands are flying out of my hands. Brandy's mom and other close friends have helped, they've been coming to get 20-50 bracelets off of me to help make money for the Memorial Fund. Brandy's mom, Carrie, she and I went to the head of the department of development at YSU, the college Brandy attended to study sociology, and the college I am currently finishing my junior year at. Carrie and I met with Catherine Calla to discuss their memorial bench program. 2500 for a bench and 1500 for a memorial tree. We are looking to raise enough for both.
I also called Target, where Brandy had previously worked, to ask if they'd host one on their property. I'm awaiting a call back. Carrie is working on setting up a spaghetti dinner and helping Brandy's friend Sebastion with getting a venue for a concert. Carrie has obtained a form to help her create a scholarship in Brandy's name, and also she is going to get a booth at a local Octoberfest at Boardman Park.
All of these things are productive and for a great cause, yes, but I really want to know when we get the answers. I've been in this sense of shock and state of responsibility, I'll be damned if Brandy Rosine goes without cause. Not a chance. Not while I'm alive.
It'll be five months in 9 days since Brandy went missing/lost her life. It feels like it happened yesterday, but these days pass as slowly as years.
I put myself in therapy, as I can't help myself through this. But all the therapists in the world can't fix this. Only time travel could. But I've got to keep positive. For positive thoughts bring positive results.